i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
