he wants to bone in the snuggie
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize