Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
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