Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
