maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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