everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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