We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
We talked him into tasing himself.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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