I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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