She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
So apparently I’m into choking now
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize