he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
