I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
