Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
