dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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