She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
