Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize