She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
And then my night got REAL pukey
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
