do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
