in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Randomize
