it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
