didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
