6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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