how can u be prego again
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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