Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
