You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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