I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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