fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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