Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
