so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
