But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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