I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
