What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Randomize
