I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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