I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
