He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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