got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
