oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
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