Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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