Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
