He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize