i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Of course I have a pirate flag
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
