u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
