She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
You need a sexual gate keeper
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
as a side note pls kill me
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
