Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Randomize
