remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
