Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
