Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
