i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Pooping to opera.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
