38 yer olds are good kisserssss
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
