No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
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