4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
