I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
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